Hope This Blog Finds You Well…
Work emails are a language of their own. You don’t just say what you mean—you strategically phrase things to sound polite while absolutely seething inside.
If corporate life had a soundtrack, it would just be the sound of people aggressively typing emails in a passive-aggressive tone.
Corporate Email Dictionary 101:
📩 “Per my last email” = I already told you this, Karen. Read it again.
📩 “Just checking in” = I’m giving you 12 more hours before I escalate this to your manager.
📩 “Let’s circle back” = I have no clue what’s happening, but let’s pretend I do.
📩 “Kind regards” = I’m THIS CLOSE to quitting, but professionalism must prevail.
The Reply-All Nightmare
There’s a special place in corporate hell for people who hit “Reply All” when a simple “Thanks!” would’ve sufficed. WHY, BRENDA, WHY?!
And let’s not even get started on those who send an email, then immediately Slack you asking if you saw it. Yes, Greg. We all saw it. We are ignoring it on purpose.
Wear Your Professionalism with Pride
If you’ve ever composed an email so well-crafted that Shakespeare himself would’ve been impressed, congratulations—you’re a “Professional Email Sender.”
Now wear the T-shirt and let people know that behind every “Hope this finds you well” is a person one coffee away from losing it.